Traveling Solo

I am here in Memphis for the St. Jude Half Marathon. I drove up yesterday, by myself. I've never driven that far by myself before. I've been the only adult and only driver for a longer distance, but never really alone.

I was nervous about losing focus, or getting sleepy, and a whole bunch of things, but I really did perfectly well. The drive took longer than I expected it to, but I kind of knew it would because I am a slow driver and I stopped three times.

The hotel is super nice, and I am used to staying alone in hotel rooms from all the travel I did for work. Now that the trip is behind me, I am getting nervous about the race tomorrow. And also nervous about what to do when I don't have this weekend to look forward to anymore.

But that is life now. I have to keep learning how to do life without Cecil. It not easy, and to be honest, I have no idea how long it will take before I am comfortable in this post Cecil life.

All I can do is keep moving forward, and hoping for the best. Really, that is all any of us are ever doing on any given day. It is just that I am extraordinarily conscious of the empty seat at the table, the missing voice in the conversation.

I will be traveling solo through life for the foreseeable future. This trip is an important step in embracing that reality.